there must be something wrong with the phrase "hit on"
she decides to stop the conversation between them.
there is a particular sensitivity towards language in her body that stops her from doing things. Just, Stop.
S.T.O.P.
then everything becomes silent.
Dead silence.
She disappears, dives under the surface of water, breathing in and out bubbles.
The lightness of "hit-on" seems to be out of tune. Then it leads the entire melody stuck in the needle of the record player.
such minor mistake is something that makes her uncomfortable.
She doesn't like being uncomfortable.
What does "hit on" mean? She asks herself. and what does "hit on me completely" mean?
"Completely".
In the contemporary world, the process may easily begin with the social network. Yes, starting from Face-book. You add somebody on facebook. You stalk them, picture, age, horoscope. You see the "punctums",
or not.
"Punctums" are crucial, a magic word of Barthes, because this is the way how you build up the connection. And the connection, certainly is subjective, as if Barthes looking at his mother's picture in the winter garden, which leads to the following fantasy of love. Then the entire human being is reduced into a couple of images, and a couple of lines that label them into some sort of category. Then there is this web of sophisticated formulas in your brain starting the most complicated calculation ------- Do you like the person you are looking at?
or not.
Then you start chatting, dancing with each other's minds. Thank the technology, you are able to see whether the person has received your message. If it shows "seen", but no reply, then you start wondering, why? You want attention, of course. Then the game begins, deriving from hospitality, chasing and hunting. Then you make a date. You meet. You walk together on the streets. You may go to the theatre or cinema. You may have ice-cream. During such process, there might be romance.
or not.
Then maybe you kiss after several dates or just kiss when you feel like it. Then you have sex. Then you start thinking about the relationship between you two. Then
Then what?
How pathetic.
So what is she looking for?
Everything she has done seems to be as superficial as above.
Indeed. She is superficial.
She is stupid, almost in a sarcastic way.
But why?
Why do people choose to ignore the content and just to believe the form
or they think it is not as important as her intention, her final goal, her attempt
is
"hitting on me completely"
which is already abruptly decided by certain minds from the very beginning.
Then everything they've discussed together just seems to be lighter than the feathers.
But what is she looking for?
What exactly has she been looking for?
Everyone is different
yet no one can be like him
with such gestures when talking about Benjamin
His elegant dancing hands.
She wants to find
She wants to find
She wants to find
another daydream
another nightmare.
Or perhaps
She's just in love with herself.